Lent

Lent is Harrrrrrrd. For lent, I gave up alcohol, sex, and red meat. When you give up shit like that you notice a few things: All of your friends want to go out, and buy you drinks, but they never did before. There's not much to eat thats convenient except burgers. Sex is beautiful, and when you give it up, its readily available.

I don't think i've ever wanted to have sex as much as I do right now. Its ridiculous, and may God have pity on the woman who breaks my fast. I'm going to do some evil things to whomever that is.
The red meat isn't a problem until I decide I'm going to get something to eat. I always so "lemme go get a burg...". Then my friend says "lets hit south street (click here). Best cheesesteak you'll ever have outside of Philly. They do the unthinkable: put cheese wiz on the sammich. Oh Lord. Let's not reminisce on that.

Alcohol is easy, but I realized how much I use it as a crutch. I get mad, i have a drink. I get unhappy, I have a drink. I can't think, I have a drink. I drink like people breathe. Hey, i'm saving my liver and money.